ReadThinkLearnLaugh (May 2011)
Wednesday, May 4, 2011 at 11:01AM "Point of View"
Introduction
The one trait that separates human beings from the rest of the animal kingdom is our striving for success and achievement. People seem to always want something else. Bigger. Better. Different. Whatever it is that we don’t have.
Whether this is a noble or ignoble trait does not matter, it is an ever-present driving force in our lives.
It is surprising then that we know so little about success and happiness – and how to achieve it. Surprising, because there is probably no topic that has had more trees felled in pursuit of an answer.
The answer to this vexing question is simple and complicated. Simple on a philosophical level and complicated in a pragmatic level: easy to understand hard to execute.
The answer lies in the way you see things.
(What are the odds that the answer will be found in an irregular newsletter by some middle-aged bloke living in regional Australia?)
The litmus test is whether this ‘answer’ actually applies on all levels of our lives, and in this essay I want to consider three different applications – as per the diagram.
Read on and tell me whether you agree with my answer…
Success (& Happiness)
The way we see things is often described as ‘perspective’. We encourage people to see things in perspective, or tell them they have a wrong perspective or have lost perspective.
If you are on the receiving end, we never heed that advice because, intuitively and rightly so, we dismiss that advice based on the infallible logic that their perspective is no better or righter than my perspective!
Perspective is commonly defined as “the appearance of things relative to one another as determined by their distance from the viewer”.
Note: it is the ‘appearance’ of the thing, not the thing itself.
A more specific definition is “the choice of a or a reference (or the result of this choice) from which to sense, categorize, measure or codify experience, cohesively forming a coherent belief, typically for comparing with another.”
In short, your perspective is how you make sense of the world
I am going to get pretty deep here, but bear with me. (Eventually I will draw the bow back to retail/marketing/entrepreneurship.)
Buddhists believe that the origin of suffering is attachment.
Specifically: The origin of suffering is attachment to transient things and the ignorance thereof. Transient things do not only include the physical objects that surround us, but also ideas, and -in a greater sense- all objects of our perception.
The solution is dispassion (or Nirodha - the unmaking of sensual craving and conceptual attachment) but in simple terms, unhappiness can be turned into happiness with a simple change in perspective.
Many wise people agree.
• Most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be. ~Abraham Lincoln
• A great obstacle to happiness is to expect too much happiness. ~Bernard de Fontenelle
• We are no longer happy so soon as we wish to be happier. ~Walter Savage Landor
• A man's as miserable as he thinks he is. ~Seneca
• If you are not happy here and now, you never will be. ~Taisen Deshimaru
• Happiness is a function of accepting what is. ~Werner Erhard
Read these quotes slowly again and you will see that there is a shared philosophy: happiness is a matter of perspective.
For a profoundly moving understanding of what it means to really change your perspective, watch this video.
We have all been brought up (most of us at least) with the very European notion that it is good strive. (Taken to the limit by our American cousins.) We have to dream. In fact if you don’t strive for something big, you are failure. Believe and achieve.
Watching American Idol, we all laughed at the ridiculousness of some people’s dreams and beliefs. We delighted in these ‘idiots’ being ripped into by the judges for their pathetic attempts to chase their dreams. (Ironically also marvelling at the success of the ‘winner’ that emerged, further strengthening that defective cultural norm.)
But those (unrealistic) beliefs were the natural (if unintended) consequences of that worldview.
For a long time I was anti-planning and anti-objective setting because I know (see) the unhappiness it causes when you are perpetually planning (dreaming) to be somewhere else.
In fact, the first business we registered in Australia was called Live the Moment – because Moonyeen and I have both always believed that the ability to (live the moment) it is the cornerstone of happiness.
It is not of course. It is important, but it is not the key.
The key to happiness is acceptance of what is.
If you find yourself unhappy with what is - change your perspective.
Hey, that is easily said. If your house has just been flooded or you have lost a family member (or even just your dog) then it is not easy to just change your perspective. And that is not what I am advocating.
Experiencing sadness is actually necessary.
What I am talking about is the need to change your overall orientation: to have a different propensity.
- Your first reaction should be to accept, not to judge.
- Your first response to an emergency should be ‘what can I do’ not ‘why me’.
- Your attitude to a new experience should be ‘what can I learn’, not ‘what can go wrong’.
I think you get the picture.
I see many VCRs/DVRs still flashing 00:00:00. This is the ‘default’ setting for digital clocks. When you fill in a form/survey, there is usually a structural bias built-in because the way the questions are phrased. (Remember how John Howard phrased the question about the Australian Republic – and got the result he wanted?)
We all have a default perspective.
It usually just happens.
But that means you can also change it.
If you want to.
Action Steps
- You know what to do.
- Do it.
BONUS ACTION STEP:
- If you have a Kindle or if not, just download the free app on your smartphone.
- Go to Amazon. Go to the KINDLE eBook section. Search for "Do the Work" by Steven Pressfield.
- Download the free EBook. Read it - and follow the advice.
Selling (& Persuasion)
Perspective is important when it comes to persuasion and influence (which is what selling is all about.)
You have to put your thinking cap on and consider the questions (originally posed by researchers Tversky and Kahneman) carefully.
If you were given the following two options, what would you choose?
1. A sure gain of $240
2. A 25% chance to gain $1000 and 75% chance of getting nothing.
84% of people chose the more certain Option 1. (The vast majority chooses the certainty.)
They then offered them one the following choices:
1. A sure loss of 750
2. A 75% chance of losing $1000 and a 25% chance to lose nothing.
Now 73% preferred to gamble by selecting Option 2. (The vast minority now chooses UNcertainty.)
In both scenarios the options on offer are (statistically or rationally) exactly the same. You would expect people to favour the two options equally (a normal distribution based on another variable) OR to consistently favour the ‘safe’ or the ‘risky’ option.
But people change their decision based on the perspective they are exposed to (framing).
I see a holiday as an opportunity for a quiet read. My son sees it as an opportunity for adventure. We both look at the same scenario with a different frame.
Fairhurst and Sarr (1996) described a few framing techniques, which are all effective in some way in persuading another person.
• Metaphor: To give an idea or program a new meaning by comparing it to something else.
• Stories (myths and legends): To frame a subject by anecdote in a vivid and memorable way.
• Traditions (rites, rituals and ceremonies): To pattern and define an organization at regular time increments to confirm and reproduce organizational values.
• Slogans, jargon and catchphrases: To frame a subject in a memorable and familiar fashion.
• Contrast: To describe a subject in terms of what it is not.
• Spin: to talk about a concept so as to give it a positive or negative connotation.
Our Sell$mart program uses what we loosely term ‘metaphorical’ selling. We firstly identify the 6 key decision heuristics (let’s just call those decision-making shortcuts) that people use. (There are more, but these are the most useful in a retail sales environment.)
Once people understand these ‘shortcuts’ (or buttons to push) we teach them how to generate metaphors, analogies (even clichés) to express those statements in the most persuasive way.
Example:
Scenario 1:
Which statement is the best way to frame your offer to the customer?
1. Do you prefer the red dress or the blue dress more?
2. Do you like the red dress?
Scenario 2:
Let’s try one where a customer objects about the price:
1. It’s not really expensive for the quality that you are buying
2. It is a bit more expensive, but you get what you pay for.
In scenario 1 you would choose option 1. In scenario 2 you would choose 2. Some people tend to get this instinctively right and others struggle. You may even be one of those who get it right, but unless you know why you prefer the one option over another, you cannot replicate your approach (or train someone).
The good news is that these framing techniques can be learned.
Let me share a personal history with you. In my corporate career in Australia I managed to achieve a reasonable position (National Marketing Manager). But I fared better (Executive Director) in my original culture than I have in Australia. One reason for that is that I did not always frame the brand ‘Dennis’ in the most effective way.
Consider the following options for framing your disagreement with someone:
1. I disagree. What about X or Y?
2. That is an interesting approach. I just wonder what happen if X or Y happened?
Which would you choose?
I invariably chose option 1, whereas a more effective way of making the same point (I eventually learned) would have been option 2.
Success then, in selling and persuasion, depends on understanding perspective. Your own and the customer’s.
And then having the skill to articulate the perspective that suits your goals. That is, you must know how to frame your advice and your suggestions in a way that is more likely to get compliance.
The key is to understand the way the customer sees things – their perspective – and to frame your message in such a way that it appeals to the customer (pushes their buttons).
They expect you to ‘sell’ to them. (“The dress looks good on you.”) But if you resist the temptation and instead help them ‘buy’, you will be more successful.
Action Steps
1. You can enrol for the Sell$mart eLearning course HERE. If you apply the discount code 'rtll' (RTLL in lowercase), you will get 50% off!
2. You can contact me for a live Sell$mart workshop for your organisation.
3. Or do nothing.
Strategy (& Positioning)
People who create or run successful companies have invariably managed to position their company or their product successfully; relative to the competition.
Let me illustrate with some pretty pictures and a simple example with a product we all own.
After the Sony Discman, MP3 players were invented. The received wisdom in the market was that what people wanted was the smallest possible player with the largest capacity.
After the Discman, that is pretty logical right? As small as possible but with greatest capacity for songs.
This created a perceptual positioning map that looked like this. Imagine that all the manufacturers are the red dots.
Apple came along and re-defined the market.
They had a different perspective. They did not chase the attributes that every other manufacturer accepted as the conventional market wisdom.
By doing so, they instantly relegated all competitors to ‘also ran’ status.
They did not create the MP3 market. In fact, they were pretty late to it. But when they did come to the market, the brought a completely different product to the market. The capacity was nothing more than par.
The size of the unit was nothing more than par – a bit bigger in fact than some of the others in the market.
But the saw the market differently.
And they happened to be right.
They re-imagined the perceptual positioning maps with different axes. (It is easy to forget how different the iPod was when it was launched because all theother manufacturers have since copied much of the design.)
One can even argue that Apple is not the best designed MP3 unit on the market any more. But the market perceives it as such. And besides, you are now locked into iTunes – which has been the main game all along.
Action Steps
1. You can buy Jump the Curve (the eBook) here. It is everything I know that is important in starting and running a business.
2. You can contact me to discuss the live Jump the Curve workshop (customised for your organisation) here.
3. Or do nothing.
Conclusion
I have shared with you that SUCCESS and HAPPINESS (on a personal or product or business level) really boils down to how you SEE things: your perspective.
Life is what it is. There is no point to obsessing about the environment, competition or luck. Just look at the situation differently and you will see opportunity.
A few random, interesting things
1. Have you checked out this new search engine yet?
2. Are you (or do you know someone):
- interested in starting an internet-based business?
- keen to become an infopreneur?
- a consultant/coach/trainer ready to go online?
Check out this offer.
3. Here is a productivity tip.
If you regularly receive emails from the same source, and you need to continue to do so, but don't necessarily have to read them (all the time) - then do this in Outlook:
- Create a special folder for the purpose you intend (I channel internetbanking receipts into a dedicated folder.)
- Right-click on the email
- Click on 'Create Rule'
- Select the appropriate tick-box and folder name
Done: In future all emails from that source will go into that folder without cluttering up your inbox.
4. Must read on the web
- Pop-Tech - a long post with 5 videos covering your 5 senses.
- McSweeneys on the topic of when branding goes nuts.
- The previous issue of RTLL, on th topic of when social media goes nuts by your truly.
Staying connected
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- Get yourself a Gmail account (if you don't have one)
- Watch this video below
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Thank you for reading.
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God bless...
DENNIS & MOONYEEN
Reader Comments (2)
Hi Dennis, as a food retailer of 25+ years I have learnt that every customer has a different perspective of our business. There is probably 50000 people living in our local community and they don't all shop with me (and if they did I probably wouldn't cope!!) We have striven to provide product to a premium market (my perspective) but don't appeal to some customers because it doesn't suit their budget (their perspective). I will never please every one, but have derived happiness and financial security from the fact that that we appeal to enough customers to run a successful business.
There was a time early in my business life where I was not trading well at all. The major supermarket chains were attacking and, looking back, I probably had a nervous breakdown but didn't know it at the time. My perspective was that retailing had become too difficult and wasn't worth the pain and suffering. My options were to give up, fight back by persisting with a business plan and fixing the problems with my store or do nothing.
I chose to fight back and I now have a satisfying successful business.
My perspective now is I am a far better retailer because I experienced some failure. The supermarkets actually did me a favour but I didn't see it at the time!
I now understand that business is not always about continual improvement in sales and net profit but a journey of ups and downs that you must learn from.
A little bit of pain on the journey actually enhances the retailing experience.
Well said, Peter. You won't believe how happy it makes me to read something like this :-)