In a country town match, the batsman was out first ball. 'Not like last week,' said the wicket-keeper.
'No,' said the batsman. 'Last week I stayed in and got forty and when I got back all the beer was gone!'
Merv Hughes to Robin Smith
Smith plays and misses to Hughes in the Lord's Test 1989, England and Australia.
Hughes: "You can't f***ing bat, mate."
Smith then smashes the next ball for four and replies: "Hey Merv, we make a fine pair.
"I can't f***ing bat and you can't f***ing bowl."
The only time an Australian ever walks is when his car runs out of petrol. (Barry Richards, 1980)
Shane Warne : I've waited two years for another chance to humiliate you.
Daryll Cullinan : Looks like you spent it eating.